All Mimsy

Head over to Flash Fiction Online to read my teeny tiny short story All Mimsy.

Useful Text Shortcuts for All Occasions

Apple's iOS5, newly installed on iPhones across the land, has a built-in text expander. Helpful techie websites (e.g. , http://lifehacker.com/5849229/how-to-configure-ios-5s-awesome-built+in-text-expansion) offer useful suggestions for phrases and shortcuts you can program into your phone: "brb" for "Be right back," or "thx" for "Thanks," for example. I feel as though these techies aren't really exploiting the text expander's full potential. To get the most out of my iPhone and to save myself time, I've programed a few shortcuts that will save me countless hours of thumb-typing.

"stm": Stop texting me; I am busy and/or you are boring.

"ctn": Can't text now--I'm driving in the rain on the highway, and every time you text me, you knock me out of the Netflix app and interrupt my screening of "Wives & Daughters."

"ich": I can haz [to be combined with one of the following]

- "chz": cheezburger

- "fum": five uninterrupted minutes

- "atctjhastitsohap": all the children to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace

"prs": Proofread your text and resubmit it; I will then consider reading it.

"pdb": Poor, dead bastard.

"wwf" (for use within the Words With Friends app): I accept your surrender.

"manifesto": I hereby declare that I will stand up for the rights of the downtrodden, the neglected, the hungry; and that I will cherish every brightly burning spark of inspiration, innovation, inclusion, and love that drives us to be better humans and makes the universe spin with wonder and harmony and joy; and that I will require a margarita.